Well I was hanging out round the back of Aldi
On a Sunday they throw out all the stuff that’s mouldy
Except most of it’s not actually mouldy, it’s edible
I take some of it home, just seems ethical
It’s certainly cheaper than doing a big shop
I say cheaper, it’s free, that’s about the biggest price drop
You’re gonna get, I guess, but I digress
It was about 8pm, more or less
I was checking some bread when I saw her
Bit stale, but it’d be fine with some water
She was leaning on a wall, with a cigarette
Her eyes were smoky, her hair was what you’d call brunette
I plucked up the courage to introduce myself
Can’t remember what I said, it was casual but heartfelt
I took her to Bella Italia
I had antipasti, she had a lasagne
We talked a bit, but she seemed to glaze over
I asked her what was wrong and she said she had to go now
I said, can I see you again? She just said bye
I pushed her for an answer, and she replied
You’re not my type, you’re too introverted
You don’t stand out in a crowd
You’re not my type, you’re too unassertive
I like my guys to be loud.
She just wants a douche
I said, I’m sorry I don’t meet your requirements
I know I’m not ripped like a sexy fireman
But I refuse to believe you’re just attracted to idiots
You’re better than that and in my experience
If you’re attracted to bad boys, then that’s a bad choice
She said, why? I said
You don’t have to be Sigmund Freud to work it out
Besides, I can be a bad boy
She just laughed & said, not in those corduroys
I said, no, it’s about striking a balance
I can act tough, but without being callous
I’m good at banter; I’ll just tone it down a bit
I can be sexy, without being a dick
She said, prove it; get sexy for me
Get sexy for me
I said, OK, on the count of three
this is an amazing little album, as should be expected from rob. it's fascinating to hear something that was recorded way back in 2008 for the first time.
the compositions are all stellar, and I dig the album's distinctive stylistic blend. definitely worth a buy! lyra
Robins decided to release the recording of his 2016 comedy tour during the Covid-19 shutdown at the behest of fans. Bandcamp New & Notable May 29, 2020
Comedian Chris Gethard’s hilarious new surprise album is devoted to the great state of New Jersey, and the great state of New Jersey alone. Bandcamp New & Notable Dec 18, 2019
All the tracks are full of life, full of power and mostly full of fun! I really enjoy every single one of these tracks and I can't wait to receive it on vinyl :D Thanks Rob! rubenoost20